4/23/17

i stretch
cat like
out
on your deck

purring

eying you
lazy
sleepy

spring sun
warming

the sky
a brilliant
cerulean

so close

i reach
to pull it
down

stretching
fingers up up

cutting
shadow silhouettes
across my face

the deck ceiling
peeling
a mustard yellow

i like it

almost as much
as i like
being here

sprawled out
eating
sunshine like

i paid good money
for that

you in your bathrobe
coffee in hand

and me,
on my back
squinting
up up

do you
think god
knows we
talk about
him

would he laugh
to hear
us

if i were god,
i would laugh

we are so small
we are so human

and
it is april

the sky is
blue
the ceiling
yellow

it is april
and i am
on my back
in the sun

it is april
and you are
so

unexpected

in your slippers
and morning scruff

and me,
grinning hard
because

it is april
and
the sky
is so close
today

funny

so is god

so are you

it is here we find the new

what did i
expect

when you
plunged
into
me

seeking
the
center

i gasped

air sweet
with your
sweat

poured
in

drenching me

blessed new
raw beginnings

fingers
clutching
clutching
rosary
hot

like

thank you

thank you for
everything
for nothing

that was all

i did not
say your name

i did not need it
to understand

the universe
that lay
within me

throat coated
starry eyed 
diamonds

toes curled
around
saturn

crescent moon
carved
in my navel

the milky way
in my clavicle

it was everything
it was enough

clutch

reaching reaching
palms white
shaking

open
willing

i wait for the
air birds
to fall

thick
heavy

all a flutter
heaving
breaths

white innocence
glinting soft
down

falling falling

feather
snow

drifting
drifting

but
i can’t
make
it

stick

tight
fingers
grabbing

clutching
air

no birds
just

the space
between my
finger bones

telling me
the empty
still
eats
alone

sobbing

the feathers
fall through

clutching
hands

do you remember
that
summer

the wind soft
in your hair

lights flickering
about your
temples

no air birds
to haunt
us then

but
winter
is still upon
us

i grow
weary
of the grey fear

that sucks
my marrow

clean

collision

we’ve been
strapped in
for what

feels like forever

driving
somewhere

anywhere

except
where
we just
were

bumping
    hard
smashing
    loud

going going

going circles
against
what
used to be

what now is

is not
who we were

the last time

i crashed into
you

you said it hurt

no shit
there was glass
everywhere
so

i did
it again
because

well

because it hurt
me
too

and you can’t
be the only
one

who gets hurt who gets
to hurt
around here

besides
you were
in my

way

going going

going circles

to nowhere
to anywhere

but where
you
used to be

better believe
next time i crash
into you

we will be
different

we will be
older

but we will still
be

going going

we will still be

bumper cars

we will still be
hurt