Love Words

I tried writing you love poems.

I tell you this because you care so much and

I want you to know that I care too.

Not as much as you

Perhaps

But enough to make my heart go beat beating hard

When I see you.

Enough to make my words get stuck

In my teeth when you’re around

My tongue prying them out and

Making an attempt at intelligible conversation.

They suck.

The poems, I mean.

They feel old between my fingers,

Clichés worn and tarnished and

Nothing feels here or now or as much as I love you.

I can’t give you these poems because

You deserve better but I don’t know

How to do that.

So here are my emotions

Ironed flat onto the page like my heart

Steamrolled by, left inky tracks.

Can we pretend these words can capture

My smile

When I see the screen light up with your name?

The ache the need the desire the want.

Can we act like “I miss you” stands in

For long talks, long walks, conversations that

Left me wanting to know more?

It almost hurts in a way to know that

Others have felt this too

Because it’s so personal that I want to believe

I’m the only one who’s ever missed

Or loved

Or wanted

You.

Please act like this is an acceptable

Though unconventional

Love poem.

The words bled out of my heart

Onto the keys

Before I could stop them.