I do not think these to be, yet I know them as such.

Desire

is different

than

yearning.

Please define.

Yearn.

Germanic base

(meaning “eager”),

|yərn|

intense feeling of

loss or lack or longing.

Desire.

Latin base,

(desiderate—“feel a keen desire for”)

|dəˈzī(ə)r|

strongly wish for or want.

Yet,

my bones ache forward,

desire dripping

as they

yearn towards

[ _____________________],

ask

for what

they cannot have.

In that way,

the words

are different.

And in that way,

they are the same:

co-mingled in soul flesh,

bonded together

by heart-ache

that gives me

jumbled promises,

kisses my cheek,

closes my

hands

in the door.

They have united

against

mutual enemy:

want.

But both

are

passions:

desire

surging like

red satin

aflame,

yearning

crying violet

tears

heavy upon

the dirt.

They are ripping me

a          p          a          r          t

in a

fire-work

display

of burgeoning

intensity.

“Dear god,

dear god--

please.” 

I want I want I want--

(that which,

for now,

is forbidden)

-- I want I want I want--

(but this does not

keep me

whole)

--I want!

Logical brain bit says:

“patience”

and

“in time”

and

“no promises”

and

stretches out endlessly as I roll it along the hill of doubts I have dug shamefully high.

I lick my lips.

They taste like

disatisfaction

and hollow

thoughts.

I spit it out.

It is much too bitter

to keep

for long.

Desire,

meet

yearning--

culminate in

angular poses of

pale skin

in mirror,

try to determine

what/who

I

want/want to be.