i hate that i think about you

i woke up last night tangled

in thoughts of you

splayed out sick my body

hated 

craved 

begged 

for you

i think about that 

dark drive home

music hitting horizon hitting

your cheeks me thinking

well damn and

you smiling

did i know then

or was it when you were

asleep head on my arm

questions sitting pretty

all crooked

in your brow line

was that when or

ever

i knew

and just hypothetically weren’t we

going to be together 

forever (just

hypothetically)

why

is it so easy to leave behind

your shadow

it’s also like this:

it’s like i plugged in 

too deep 

i always do

but roots grown thick come

out quick when

you yank them 

too hard

i hate that i think about you 

but i can’t hate you

yet