sink

when i was
ten

i dove into
the deep end
of the pool

hands hitting
water splitting

sharp

cold up my
veins

plunging whole

oxygen bubbling
whale-like
streams
behind
me

i slipped
into the
silence

light
glimmering
soft blue

sinking sinking
to where it
was deepest

arms floating
gentle, up

here, i heard
nothing
but my
heart

i opened my mouth

let the air escape

listened to the
dull thump
in my ears

i am still here i am still alive

and the
world was
hushed

split open blue
poured out
mosaic

my lungs were young
burning things—

my heart ignored
their cries

i sat, stranded
sunk at the
center

12 ft
glistening
up

thinking
for the first time

what it would
be to die

my soul
suspended
in star soup

floating
glistening

underneath
silence

everything
above
it all

hung steady
between
saturn and venus

listening to
the planet’s rings
sing

pushing straight through
an asteroid belt

i plummet
upwards

breaking the surface
with one giant
splashing breath

lungs humming happy:

for now
for now

it is good to be ten
it is good to be breathing

it is good
just to be

the water
inhales
around me

like a prophecy